Ep. I hate retarded twists...

[Helen]

So Lil is out...or so I thought. She still has a chance to be in the game if she wins some challenge. Ugh. I hope that dumb moron rat hick fails miserably. If she comes back then it will be veryyyyyyyy awkward lolz. My cards have been exposed, her and Eliza will definitely not trust me, and with 16 contestants I doubt the tribes will remain the way they are. I bet there's going to be some ugly tribe switch with me ending up on the minority and I'll have either or both those two skank whores with me.

Now I have to gain Eliza's trust by making up a ridiculous lie about Lil wanting an alliance with Deena and Judd and that she was willing to backstab us...hence why I "flipped". Eliza is stupid enough to believe whatever I say.

[Helen]

It's as if the Survivor Gods hate me! Lil is back, but luckily NOT on my tribe. Deena is stuck with her and I hope they can send her packing AGAIN.

What do I think of my new tribe?

Teresa- Other than Lil, this has to be the worst person to be stuck with! I honestly can't stand her, and I'm not sure how long I can bottle up my rage before I blow up on her. I want to rip her tranny face off and feed it to spider monkeys. Fucking festering pile of pig vomit!

Elizabeth- shitbird and a total whore, she will no doubt be in an alliance with Teresa.

Burton- Don't know much about him, but he comes off as a question mark and I'll probably have to keep a close eye on him.

Judd- Awesome! At least there is some saving grace to this latest twist.

Tom- Ok, Tom is my biggest threat at the moment. It's going to be a toss up between him and I as to who will take control of this tribe. He seems like a very active, tough competitor. But I can also try to align with him and use him to my benefit. I'll think about this one for the time being...

Sean- Asked me for an alliance, I accepted.

Helen- She's like da B-O-M-B.

Greg- Meh. Hopefully our first boot. He comes from Teresa's former tribe and that can be dangerous. Teresa already is pretty tight with Elizabeth and they can make a 3-some alliance with Greg. The sooner I separate them the better.

[Helen]

And with Ace out, Crystal and I are the only remaining Mzst. survivor 4 players.

Anyway, I PM'd Tom just to say hi but that bitch has not replied and that worries me. I know he's close with Teresa and Elizabeth, and that is not good for me! Teresa and Elizabeth both hate me and I think I could be targeted first.

I'm going to try to pull Sean and Burton in the alliance I have with Judd.

[Helen]

And WTF, this tribe is soooo mentally retarded. Tom makes me puke with his constant lame posts about wanting to fuck Elisabeth. Get a fucking life you old dirty douche. And Elisabeth keeps teasing him, like ewwww she's such a nasty, negative, alcoholic, silicone-enhanced golddigger.

And I have no idea what their on about, their conversations are soo boring. "Let's partyy"........"Tom where's the drinks at"........"Yay zomgs for yayom!".

It's like they're all speaking in foreign Chinese, nothing is making sense to me. I can't relate to any of these psychotropic drug addicts.

[Helen]

Lulz, so worthless Lil has been sending everyone on my tribe a PM telling them to vote me out. Her head is so absolutely high up her ass that she didn't realize the first PM she sent was to me. Wow, this sad bitch fails at FAILING.

So any attempt to bond with my new tribe has definitely taken a big blow thanks to bitter Lil. They already viewed me as a wicked witch, I doubt they're perception will get any better. If we lose the next challenge, I definitely feel extremely vulnerable.

I'll have to speak to Greg and get him to vote with Burton, Sean, Judd and myself.

I mean this whole tribe switch just HAD to happen today. Mas pulls a twist when I decide to pull a blindside. Great.

[Helen]

Right now the alliance is me, Judd, Sean, Burton and Greg. I've spoken to Sean and Burton and it looks like we're all on the same page. I'll butter them as much as I can. But knowing this game ANYONE can be bullshitting anyone, so I'm not going to sit on my high horse yet thinking I've got everything locked.

Priority uno: win challenge

If that fails, then hopefully the seeds I've planted into people's head will blossom into a nice wittle plant. And that is to take down our version of the onion alliance: Big fatfuck Tom, self-confessed bitch Elisabeth, and ManFace tranny Teresa.

[Helen]

We lost a challenge that we were suppose to win. But thanks to Greg's inactivity we're heading to tribal. Fabulous.

Should I be feeling nervous? HELL YES. That bitter bitch Lil was telling everyone to vote me out during the challenge. WTF SKANK!? Sit your crusty ass back down.

So thanks to her I feel like I have a slight target on my back tonight. I could get blindsided by my alliances (the only person I really trust is Judd). But I don't want to think too much about that. Paranoia is for the weak and Republicans. Both of which I aint....mmmmmmHmmmmmm.

Everyone on our tribe seems set on voting out Greg. It makes sense...voting out the weak link = happy, jolly strong tribe. However, if Greg decides to show up, that is a free vote for my alliance. Something that I’m not willing to give up that easily! I can use the numbers to vote out one of those annoying idiots. But if Greg is absent and I decide to target the onions, ill essentially be forcing a 4-4 tie because Greg will receive a penalty vote. That is something I don't want happening. It will expose my cards and won't be good.

Sean and Judd are both set on voting out Greg from what they've told me. So I guess I'm just going to have to go with the consensuses at the moment. The good thing is that with Greg gone I'll still have the numbers advantage come next tribal.

But here's hoping that good 'ol Gregory decides to show up and I do not get blindsided!

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